The Millennial is in New York…

… And I cannot write this blog without him. I lack confidence & the belief that there is any point to this endeavour whatsoever…

Here is a comprehensive list of how you can amuse yourself instead:

  1. Binge watch Russian Doll on Netflix. I’m running a temperature & it’s giving me the chills.
  2. Afterwards, add (a) My New Year’s Resolution by Mae West, (b) Migas 2000 by The Liminanas & (c) I Go To Sleep by Anika to your playlist – wherever that may be.
  3. Re: 2(b) I cannot understand a word of French but apparently she’s reading out a recipe – please translate below if you are, in fact, parley-ing the Francais, I feel we might all need to cook it… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSy9QpmcpEE
  4. If you can’t be bothered to do as I advise in points 1, 2 & 3, enjoy this Mae West wisdom I have transcribed for you:
  5. ‘Ooh… For the New Year, I’m gonna stay away from temptation… as long as temptation stays away from me…*
  6. Um… Aw… And when I have to choose between two evils I’m gonna pick the one I never tried before…*
  7. You know next year, I’m gonna keep a close check on my conscience – I can’t have that bothering me…*
  8. Aw… And I’m gonna have good will to all men. And the more men… the more I will…’ *
  9. I hope you are loving New York, Millennial…
  10. *IT MAY BE THE 3rd FEBRUARY BUT I THINK WE SHOULD ALL UPDATE OUR DATING RESOLUTIONS FOR 2019 ACCORDINGLY – THANK YOU & GOODNIGHT. X 

For more tales of Bad Romance – a Netflix series waiting to happen – please come back when the Millennial returns or buy the book here.

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